Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow

Yesterday, today and tomorrow are all now.

‘I wish I can go back and change things’

I’m pretty sure we’ve all desired the same thing. Maybe some wished it openly, some kept it to themselves. We all have regrets. We all have a thing or two(maybe more) in our past that we would want to change if given a chance. But the problem is, there will never be a chance to change them. Because no one will ever give us that chance. Not even God. God will and is capable of giving chances but NOT to change the past, but to ensure that the future won’t end up like the past.

We all heard that phrase, ‘Past is past’ and agreed that it is true. But no one really accepted it as easy as nodding. Moving on is one of the hardest things on earth, next to forgiveness, in my opinion. But I want to share this little mantra of mine. I want to call it a mantra, deal with it, friends, please.

Yesterday, today and tomorrow are all NOW!!!

“Another chapter in the book cant go back but you can look
And there we are on every page
Memories I’ll always save
Up ahead on the open doors
Who knows what were heading towards?
I wish you love I wish you luck
For you the world just opens up
But it’s so hard to say goodbye                                                                                                               Yesterday’s gone we gotta keep moving on”

These lines are from I’ll Always Remember You by Miley Cyrus. She sang that as Hanna Montana. And yes, I’m a Hannah Montana girl. We actually share the same age and that’s irrelevant here.

Moving on, the song talks about the past, memories that will be saved in one’s heart. But the singer doesn’t say that she’ll stay with those memories, but will keep moving on, because there are open doors waiting for her.

I realized that memories can stay but WE can stay in the memories. Let me rephrase that: We can choose not to forget our past, the good parts and the bad ones, but we shouldn’t stay living IN those memories.

The song says, can’t go back, but you can look. Going back is actually not possible but looking back is. That’s why I have this belief that my past, my future and my today are all NOW. My present defines my future but it also reflect what my past is.

Since going back is not an option, why not we just look, took a glance on what had been to make sure that what will be will be better than what is. Confused already? I’m saying that we get whatever useful from our past and use it now for the sake of our future.

We’ve been told to focus on NOW and make the most of the time. And that’s right but we should be careful, if we do just that-make the most of the present- we are likely to make the same mistakes we did, intentionally or unintentionally. We should be more careful now, vigilant and wiser.

Once in a while, why don’t we open that door of the past and took a glimpse before we enter into another open door that leads to our future. We should look at what’s inside that door and observe, learn and decide what we should do once we enter another door.

Our Today  should be a combination of our yesterday and our tomorrow. Our past is important because it’s our teacher. We should learn from our experiences. Our future should be a testimony of what we’ve learned from our past and that will depends on whatever we are doing NOW.

Another thing, if we do nothing but focus on now, wouldn’t it be so boring? I say we look into our future, get a glimpse of it as we should do in our past. We can’t get there now, but we can always get excited about it. Get vision of tomorrow and that’s one great motivation. If we’re not excited about tomorrow, about waking up the next morning, then why on earth are we still here for? Right?

I had this teacher in first grade who taught me of spelling because I suck at it. I’m still not good at it. I was about to compete in an English quiz bee and she thought I should be good with spelling too. So spelling was part of my training before the contest. Once, she had me spelled ‘FUTURE’ and I spelled it as ‘FEWCHUR’. I mean, I did know that time how to spell ‘FEW’ and CHUR was kind of easy to spell.

She laughed at me, the kind of laugh that is loving. The kind that mothers give to their little children when they stumble when they’re still learning how to walk. Anyway, instead of teaching me the right spelling, she told me that I can just spell ‘FUTURE’ as N-O-W.

I never understood why she did that until I’m old enough to understand life itself. She wanted me to see that my future is now. And she is right.

Now I have this chance to share something to people and if I’m going to steal my teacher’s style, I’d say, from now on, spell PRESENT as P-A-S-T-F-U-T-U-R-E.

Then, now and forever grateful,

Lili

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Our Favorite Scars

Turn your scars into stars.—–Robert H. Schuller


We’ve all been wounded. In fact, every day, we get wounds. And a big wound or not, deep or not, eventually it will become a scar.

Personally, I hate scars. I guess, most women do. But earlier, my right knee caught my eyes and made me smile. Why? My right knee has been scarred for almost sixteen years now. Yes, I just said I hate scars so why smile while staring at it?

I smile at the memory it added into the chest of happy memories I own.

Big or small, every scar has a memory.

And most of the times, those memories were the most painful ones. Of course, you got wounded, it was painful. And a scar just adds frustration to our dismay. Well, scars are all physically ugly so I guess fretting about them is pretty reasonable. But what we often fail to recognise about a scar is that it means we’re HEALED. It’s amazing how we can smile or laugh at something that once had caused us pain, sometimes even made us cry.

Well, that’s one odd thing about scars. They remind us of a painful past so we can have something to smile at.

My scarred knee reminds me of once a perfect family I had. Not that I don’t have one now. It’s just that I seldom see them these days. I’m already 24 and staying with my family is a bit, well, you know, everyone has to act mature at some point.

I was eight then, and we had this little vacation at my grandfather’s farm. That was one of my happiest childhood memory. A goat, the oldest one I’ve ever seen my whole life, chased me and I tripped. Regardless of the pain it caused me, still it became one of my favorite scars. It reminds me of my childhood and my family and how things were easier when I was younger.

Reminiscing about that wound of mine made me think about Jesus, the ever loving wounded Jesus. Who was beaten and crucified. He got scars too, maybe even more than we can ever imagine or know. But I guess, those scars, those countless scars are also treasured by Jesus Himself. Simply because, YOU are the reason of those scars. YOU, ME, THEM-we are the reasons of His scars.

He offered His body to be scarred yet undoubtedly, never regret what he did, nor resent us. But the thing is we didn’t stop giving him wounds that day, two thousand years ago, at the calvary. Everyday, we still give Jesus new wounds yet we’re not even aware of it most of the time.

But He loves us so much and I can only imagine Jesus smiling every time He looks at his scars He acquired for us, or because of us. Especially those particular scars on his palms and feet. I guess, if I have my own favorite scar, Jesus has his own too. And those are the ones that he got from those three nails.

He was wounded, beaten, pained-physically and emotionally- and He even died. But see, after three days of sorrows and pain, He got up, raised from the dead and with no wounds. What left to Him were scars, and those scars made Him VICTORIOUS.

Those scars, because of those scars, the fall of the enemy began. And we share the victory with Jesus there.

See? Not every scar is ugly. Most of them can be turned into STARS that may guide us through the darkness we’re in or even to the darkness ahead of us, especially the scars we have in our hearts.

Scars mean we WON. We SURVIVED. We LEARNED. We are HEALED. We are BETTER.

GOD BLESS YOU, whoever you are who’s life has been scarred. GOD LOVES YOU and your unbelief won’t and can’t even change that!!

 

Scarred,

Lili

Slow Down

Life is a race, I was told. So naturally, I have to run. Not just to win but at least, to stay in the race. And I’m still in the race. The thing is, I wish that the one who told me life is a race, could’ve been more specific. Because if life indeed is a race, then it’s one hell of a race.

And slowing down seems to be a bad idea.

The thing is, running is exhausting. Running always left me out of breath, heart beating so frantically fast, knees and almost every part of my body is aching, and of course sweating. In short, instead of celebrating because I reached the finish line, I am busy keeping my heartbeat back to normal again. I am busy massaging my legs so they wouldn’t bruise. I am busy wiping my sweaty body. I am sore.

Life, when we ‘re done with it, shouldn’t we be dancing with joy?  Or singing at the top of our lungs? Or maybe screaming like crazy? We just won this long race called life, we should be enjoying.

Sure, runners who won running competitions were overjoyed. But with life, we’re not talking of 5K marathon, or even 10K. Not even longer than that. Life is much longer and more complicated than any other races. Running will help us winning this race but running isn’t everything that there is that we should do. And we shouldn’t be just thinking about the finish line.

Here’s what I think. In life, if we want to win with joy, we should think about the starting line as much as we think about the finish line. And I don’t know about you, but when I think of starting line, I think about my home.

Home is the best place on earth, don’t you agree? But it is also one of the places we most often disregard.

Why? Because we focus in getting to finish line.

What we don’t realize is home is where real happiness resides. It’s where everything starts anyway. It’s where we start dreaming. Most often, it is also the reason why we dream in the first place.

I must share that I’m totally in love with Ed Sheeran’s new single Castle Hill. In which he talks about his hometown and his good old days there. He can’t wait to go home and even wants to go back to the times, for him, were special.

So here’s what I thought: we can never go back time but we can always look back. Visit. Let’s pay a visit to our starting lines, once in a while. We don’t have to start all over again, we just have to remind ourselves why and how we started. Just as sometimes, reminiscing is enough to remind us what truly matter in life. But we can’t do that if we’re running and exhausted.

I suggest, we occasionally slow down and check if we are still who we were and have what we had at the starting lines. Once we do that, our finish lines would be more of a celebration rather than time for restoration and cleaning up our messy selves.

We would celebrate winning if we know what we are fighting for. Right?

Like a traveller who’s too excited to get to his destination, he forgets his house keys. So how is he gonna get in when he comes home? We’re like that too, we’re too excited to succeed in life, we often forget the keys to happiness. Love? Family? God?

Like a turtle that carries his home with him wherever he goes, let’s carry our most treasured belongings too-our loved-ones. Because life isn’t all that enjoyable if it’s just for ourselves.

Thank you for reading. Slow down a bit and think about why you’re even in this race called life.

Slowing down a bit,

LILI

Eyeing The Future

Eyeing the future should be in retrospect. Ironic, I know. But here’s my point, we eye the future as a bright one, simply because we should. Seeing our future dark and gloomy won’t help anyway. Our future depends on how we see it, and I? I see it in retrospect.

How? Since I was fourteen, I developed a habit that even then, I knew would help me a lot in the future. Every year end , I would make a list of my goals for the coming year. Other people call that list of New Years Resolution, but I don’t. Just hearing the phrase New Year Resolution is already discouraging since most people ditch their resolutions even before January ends.

Anyway, my list of goals includes the things I want to accomplish and even the things I want to buy or have or give. This year, I even include a certain person I want to meet personally.

The following is my last year’s list which will help me this year.

img_20170103_220220

Setting my goals for 2017 is checking and reflecting in my previous year’s list. My way of seeing my future is by seeing my past. My past list (With the ones I accomplished and those I didn’t) teach me how to do better this year.

Say, the third on my list says about me practice writing. I did join NaNoWriMo and gloriously won but my 2016 Journal has more empty pages than not. And my previous WordPress site  was a total shame. Why did I win NaNoWriMo? Because I forced myself to join. And I’ve been readying myself for the said event long before November. Why, on the other hand, I didn’t fill my journal? I let myself get lazy. Why my site was a shame? I let myself get lazy.

This year I know I’ll still be lazy but I’ll use the THING that helped me with NaNoWriMo-preparedness. After winning the event, I realised, planning is really very important. SO last December, I researched for topics I can use for blogging. I even start outlining my topics so it’ll be easier to blog in the coming days.

See what I did? I reflected. Then I learned not just from my mistakes but from my accomplishments as well. Then I will apply. Determine what made you win, then use it to win the things you’ve lost before.

So I guess, saying that eyeing the future should be in retrospect isn’t ironic anymore.

BY THE WAY, The image above (THE EYE) was drawn by my 15-year-old cousin.  

For the last time: Reflect, Learn, and Apply!!

—LILI 🙂 🙂 🙂